Monday, August 11, 2003

WELCOME TO SAINT LUCIA or WHY THE TOURIST BOARD SHOULD GIVE ME A JOB


For those of you who share Eric's misguided view that Saint Lucia is an oh soooo lovely place to live, you're welcome to come visit. Come for two weeks, leave your cash (US currency preferably), then leave...PLEASE.

Now for some basic info. Trust me, my sources are impecable.

Saint Lucia (NB: the following info was lifted almost in its entirety from the CIA Factbook, minus the bitchiness, of course)

Location: Caribbean basin, an island somewhere between the Caribbean Sea and North Atlantic Ocean, north of Trinidad and Tobago (Suggestion: buy an atlas and figure it out)

Geographic coordinates: 13 53 N, 60 68 W

Area: 616 sq km, comparatively 3.5 times the size of Washington, DC; with 158 km of coastline

Climate: tropical, moderated by northeast trade winds; dry season from January to April, rainy season from May to August (Translation: freaking hot, skip the make-up and blow dryers)

Terrain: volcanic and mountainous with some broad, fertile valleys (Translation: leave your good shoes at home)

Natural resources: forests, sandy beaches, minerals (pumice), mineral springs, geothermal potential (Ommission: amiable populace willing to look the other way in return for certain considerations)

Natural hazards: hurricanes and volcanic activity (Ommission: untimely death by marauding bands of giant, probably radioactive, mosquitoes)

Environment - current issues: deforestation; soil erosion, particularly in the northern region (Ommission: hordes of caucasoids of the scarlet persuasion)

Population: 160,145 (July 2002 est.; really, really, broad estimate; actually we're not sure)

Government type: Westminster-style parliamentary democracy

Capital: Castries



For more touristy type info check out these links:


The Saint Lucia Tourist Board

Saint Lucia Simply Beautiful



5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!