Wednesday, June 01, 2005


The kind people at Blogger have resuscitated this blog. Excellent. The thing is, I've been squatting over at The Guabancex Blog for a week now and don't feel inclined to move back.

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!

Monday, May 23, 2005

Weekly Gouranga OR Why I might move to Norway

This week's Gouranga entry is yet another sing-a-long. Why? Because sing-a-longs are fun, that's why. I've attempted to faithfully transcribe the lyrics, 'cause I have no life, which may be found HERE.

Now for your viewing and listening pleasure, this blog presents Norwegian soldiers doing a politically incorrect parody of the Beach Boys' classic, Kokomo. (This is sure to piss off an entire herd of you.) Click the PIC to begin. (Having trouble? Try this LINK from

It's stuck in your head now, isn't it?

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!

Sunday, May 22, 2005

Things to do when you're bored...

Rent a German.
You can select the German of your choice for an exclusive lifetime experience:
Imagine to appear with your German at parties, family events, or just hang out with them at the local shopping center.

No matter which occasion you choose, you will surely impress your environment by presenting an original German.
How about this guy?

M.Meyer, aged 61, businessman

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!

Saturday, May 21, 2005

Safety 101: Part Deux (w/ heavy 'Nooky Handbook' potential)

To avoid injury and/or embarassing supermarket incidents always read the instructions.

...a 33-year-old Welsh housewife ended up in hospital after...she became "so aroused by the 2½-inch vibrating bullet inside that she fainted" then "fell against shelves and banged her head". This prompted the attendance of the paramedics who "found the black leatherette panties still buzzing"...For the record, Ann Summers notes that Passion Pants are "Not for internal use".

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!

Safety 101: Part Un

People, I've warned you about this sort of thing before; but let's have a refresher course, shall we? Aerosol pesticide + enclosed area + electrical device = BIG BOOM

Walter Mueller, 36, from Schleswig-Holstein, closed the windows of his apartment, set about the six-legged critters with said spray, and then sat down for a quick surf. The resulting blast blew out all the windows, throwing debris up to 100 metres. Several neighbouring flats were also damaged although no-one – Mueller included – was seriously hurt.

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!

Friday, May 20, 2005

Imperfect Recall

A little while back the maternal unit and I had one of our perennial discourses on the growing suckiness of children's television of late Vis-à-vis the golden years, i.e., my childhood. This trip down memory lane was precipitated by the mildly infamous Mana-mana post. So we're chatting amiably, over cup cake batter, about how Barney et al can't hold a candle to the Muppets, Mr Rogers and Jeremy. Who, you ask? Jeremy. You know the little brown bear? The stop animation show with the charming theme song that went something like:
I'm a bear called Jeremy
I can do most anything
Mmm, mmm, mmm
Little tunes like Do Re Mi
Mmm, something, something…
Okay, right, you see the problem. Neither of us can remember the song, we just know I loved the show, which has apparently disappeared into the ether.

My love affair with the little brown bear was tantalizingly brief. I fell for him during a brief sojourn in North America. We, the maternal unit and I, had gone 'away' for medical reasons. She was deathly ill and I was quite young. That diminutive bear was of immense comfort to me during those critical months and now I've almost forgotten him. Does anyone else remember Jeremy?

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!


This is for my well meaning 'friends' who feel compelled to forward every single syrupy and or vaguely threatening email message they receive to me. (The rest of you can ignore this post and go HERE instead.) Since you, my darlings, have wilfully chosen to ignore my previous attempts at subtlety click the pic for some straight talk.

(Found via Greg's World)

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!