Friday, December 12, 2003

ILS SONT VÉRITABLEMENT FRAGILES, NON?

So apparently Yanks aren't amused, hell they're down right irritated, when confronted with the ubiquitous Canuck maple leaf. Odd that, most people don't seem to begrudge them slapping the stars 'n stripes on everything and then some.

So what's the beef? Is it because they can't stand the idea that nationals of another country might be, gasp, patriotic? Perhaps they're just upset that Canadians don't want to get their collective arses mistakenly shot up in American stead? (Who could blame 'em? I wish I had a flag anyone gave a rat's hind quarters about.)

Actually, I have a theory. I'm thinking Americans are just pissed 'cause the Canadians managed to dream up the swankiest flag on the block. And it's not even slightly derivative, no.

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MORE CANADIAN BÉTIZ


And so as Le Funky PM (aka Jean Chrétien) steps down, we begin our intermittent tribute to all those wacky Canadian elected officials.

Today we explore the mystery of why they can't seem to keep their clothes on. No, I'm not talking about ex-PM Kim Campbell showing a bit 'o skin, nope, that's old news. I'm talking about Mayor Sharon Smith's (Houston B.C.) nudie pic, taken by her husband no less, wit' nuttin' on but her ceremonial chain. Narf!

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STUPID CRIMINAL ALERT or When Santas goes bad...

Tip; upon utilization of Santa disguise in the commission of a criminal act, eg. the robbing of an Aussie bank of several thousand dollars, it is advisable to remove said disguise in totum so as to effect a sucessful escape.

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IT'S NOT LIKE Y'ALL ARE ACTUALLY WORKING, cont'd...

Flash...Ooooomm!

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REGARDING WINDIES CRICKET

Yes I've been studiously ignoring the South Africa tour on the suspicion that the Windies only win when I'm not watching. So far so good.

But for those of your who care here's the tour schedule and update:-

  • Dec. 03 Windies beat Nicky Oppenheimer's Eleven by 12 runs (One-day practice match), Randjesfontein

  • Dec. 05-08 Windies vs Free State (4-day match) - Match ends in a draw, Bloemfontein

  • Dec. 12-16 First Test Johannesburg. At Stumps, South Africa 368/3, RR: 4.09

  • Dec. 19-22 Tour match East London

  • Dec. 26-30 Second Test Durban

  • Jan. 02-06 Third Test Cape Town

  • Jan. 09-12 Tour match Benoni

  • Jan. 16-20 Fourth Test Centurion

  • Jan. 23 Practice one day match Paarl (d/n)

  • Jan. 25 First ODI Cape Town (d/n)

  • Jan. 28 Second ODI Port Elizabeth (d/n)

  • Jan. 30 Third ODI Durban (d/n)

  • Feb. 01 Fourth ODI Centurion

  • Feb. 04 Fifth ODI Johannesburg (d/n)

5 Ninjas, 1 Kitten and a Fifth of Vodka!