Newly released mental patient butchers Briton in his flat.
"Horrified officers found the dismembered body of the dead man after they were called to a flat in East London...the maniac was frying the brain in the kitchen."
Family of six discovered after living 20 years in isolation.
"Their behaviour is animalistic and they can't even communicate in an understandable language, officials said, adding one of them walks on all fours, almost like a monkey."
Of Aristide and Haiti; from Andrew Gumbel's article "The little priest who became a bloody dictator like the one he once despised":
"There was a time, 20 years ago, when anyone wishing to come to grips with the grotesque poverty and fitful violence of Haiti under the crumbling Duvalier dictatorship would have been itching to meet Jean-Bertrand Aristide. Back then, he was known as le petit prêtre, the little priest, a man whose modest stature belied a lion-hearted courage in denouncing social and political injustices."
TALK ABOUT COJONES...
Oxford student bluffs his way through day and a half of lectures to Chineses PHDs with nothing but an A-Level textbook.
"Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and it seems as if this young man will go far."