1st Test - Kinsgston, JA
Day 3 - West Indies 311 and 8 for 0 (Gayle 8*, Smith 0*) trail England 339 (Hussain 58, Butcher 58) by 20 runs
Poster Boy of the day:
Tino Labertram Best - 3 for 57
Batting Style: Right Hand Bat
Bowling Style: Right Arm Fast Medium
How to diss a ticket wielding mountie and get away with it. First off it helps if you're a little girl.
"Nice horse you got there sir, did Santa bring it to you?"
"Yes, he sure did," chuckled the cop.
The girl looked up at the cop and said, "Next year tell Santa the dick goes underneath the horse, not on top."
Extraordinarily STUPID CRIMINAL ALERT
- This however, may be a case of the failure of modern schooling techniques. Conneticut teen, who should have in school at the time, gets busted for trying to sell drugs to cops wearing jackets marked 'POLICE'.
- More news of narcoleptic criminality. Burgler caught sleeping in garage.
- Tip. Getting busted by gang of kids will not serve you well in the big house.
"Five children in the German city of Essen have managed to catch a shoplifter who stole jumpers from a department store."
'Willing female?'This sounds like a job for Lee Collinson.
'Fine bottle of wine circa 1960 something or other?'
UPDATE (or no nooky for you)
The German who'd sued social services for 2,500 EUROS to subsidise his porn and hooker habit has been clapped in irons. Helmut H has been given 6 months for "being a nuisance and for insulting behaviour to government officials".